


An angel of the Lord

by Phantomangelgoddess



Series: An angel of the Lord [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blood, Emotional Rollercoaster, F/M, Happy Ending, Injury Recovery, Minor Violence, Near Death Experiences, Pain, Romance, Some angst, Torture, Violence, alcohol (mentioned), injured reader, soul mates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-05-25 08:34:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6187606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phantomangelgoddess/pseuds/Phantomangelgoddess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when a fellow hunter of the Winchesters meets an angel of the Lord? And that hunter just so happens to be that angel's soulmate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Barn

**Author's Note:**

> So this is a little series I am working on. I hope you like it and I would really love some feedback on it. Thanks!

Lighting cracked through the sky; lighting up the shabby, decrepit barn.  
“What the hell,” Y/n gasped, turning to look at Dean. The other hunter just shrugged and looked down at the summoning bowl. “Maybe it didn’t work,” Bobby grumbled from across the barn. Then, the barn door exploded just as another thing of lightning cracked across the sky.  
The light briefly revealing a man in a trench coat storming through the opening. Dean grabbed his shotgun and immediately started unloading it into the mysterious man. The man shot Dean an irritated look before making the gun fly across the room. You watch as the man crosses the room and puts two fingers to Bobby’s forehead; making Bobby crumple to the floor.  
“What the hell are you,” Dean asks, his gaze steady and serious; before checking on Bobby. “I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition,” the man replies in a low gravelly voice. “Say again,” Dean says looking slightly annoyed but also slightly nervous. “My name is Castiel, I am an angel of the Lord,” Castiel replies. “Wait angels are real,” you gasp.  
Castiel finally turns and looks right at you with his piercing blue gaze. You look away as he walks towards you, and your gaze lands on his wings. You didn’t notice them before but now you can see they are unlike anything you have ever seen. They are a unique shade of onyx, and when the light catches them just right, they seem to shimmer. You tear your gaze away to look at the angel standing right in front of you with his head tilted slightly. You feel a blush rise to your cheeks when you notice his staring.  
“There is something about you I cannot figure out; I feel drawn to you and I do not know why,” Castiel says quietly almost to himself.  
You sneak a glance to Dean who just shrugs, and has a I don’t know what the hell he is talking about look. “Alright, look, so you’re the one who dragged me out of Hell, right,” Dean finally asks, drawing Castiel’s attention away from you. Castiel turns away from you and you feel a pang of sadness, which you quickly shake away.  
Why the hell am I so worried about this guy, I don’t even know him you think to yourself.  
“Yes,” Castiel says, “it was my mission to bring you back.”  
“Alright, let’s say that’s true, and let’s say you really are an angel; which I’m having a hard time believing,” Dean mutters the last part to himself.  
Before Dean can say anything else, lightning once again brightens the barn and in the light you see Castiel’s wings stretch and show themselves. Dean looks a little awestruck, “alright, alright we get it, okay,” Dean says, “so what exactly do you want from me now.”  
You tune out the rest of the conversation, and you find yourself watching the angel. You notice how he keeps his wings tight against his back, making sure they don’t knock anything over. You also notice when he seems confused he tilts his head slightly. All of a sudden you realize Dean and Castiel have stopped talking and are staring right at you.  
A blush quickly rises to your cheeks. “Um…what,” you mutter, looking anywhere but at the angel. “You okay, y/n,” Dean asks, looking at you puzzled. “What, yeah I’m fine, I’m fine,” you say quickly. Dean just nods slowly and turns back to Castiel. Castiel looks at you for a few more seconds before finally saying, “I must go, but I will be in touch.” Then, just like that as quickly as the angel had come into your life, he had left even quicker.


	2. The ghost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel saves you from death, but when you want to ask him questions, will he give you the answers you are looking for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So normally I will do these chapters every week, maybe before then if I start getting feedback, anyways enjoy and thanks!

It was 4 weeks and two days until you saw Castiel again.  
You were packing up your hunting bag, when you heard the flutter of wings behind you. “Y/n,” Castiel says as you turn around, “where is Dean, I must speak to him.”   
“Well hello to you too,” you mumble to yourself, “I don’t know where Dean is, he said something about finding out the truth or something.”  
You watch as his wings drop slightly, almost as if in disappointment. “If you need help with something,” you start to say, “I have to go,” Castiel says and disappears in a flutter of wings.   
***  
You swing the flashlight behind you and look at the old faded picture of an old woman. You sigh, “why do ghosts have to haunt the old, creepy, houses.”  
All of a sudden, you are flung across the room; you hit the wall with a thud. The ghost of the old woman from the picture appears before grinning like a maniac. Before you can grab your shotgun, the ghost thrusts her hand into your chest and grips your heart. You gasp for breath as your hand fumbles to grab your shotgun that lays just barely out of reach. Your vision starts to fade, and the ghost screams a piercing wail before going up in flames. You gasp and just as your vision fades to black, you see the blue eyes of your savior.  
***  
“Y/n, please wake up,” you hear a familiar voice say off to your right, you manage to open your eyes and you see Dean’s forest green eyes looking down at you.   
“Dean, what the hell happened,” you say as you start to sit up, and Dean helps you. “You almost got yourself killed, that’s what happened,” Dean exclaims angrily, before sighing and looking down at his hands, “I shoulda been there, damn it.”  
“Dean, don’t you dare blame yourself; I thought I could’ve handled it, it is not your fault,” you say placing your hand on his shoulder.   
“If Cas hadn’t of been there, you would be dead Y/n,” Dean runs a hand down his face. “Wait, Castiel saved me,” you look over to him with a raised eyebrow.   
Dean nods, “yeah he showed up just in time and when you blacked out he zapped you here.” You shake your head a little, “Dean that’s not possible, Castiel doesn’t even like me, why would he save me anyway.” Dean just shrugs “I dunno Y/n, all I know is he saved your life; well hey, now that I know you aren’t gonna die on me, I was gonna head out to the bar; wanna come,” Dean asks, getting up and grabbing his jacket. You shake your head, “no, it’s okay, I think I’ll stay here.” Dean nods and heads out the door.   
You look up to the ceiling, “um… Castiel, Dean told me what you did and I just want to say thank you; and I also want to ask why, why did you save me,” you suddenly shake your head, “this is stupid, what am I doing.” You look down at your hands and are so lost in thought you don’t hear the flutter of wings.  
“Y/n,” a deep, gravelly voice says. You jump a little and your head snaps up, “Castiel,” you breathe. “I heard your prayer,” Castiel says, looking around the motel room. “Oh, I wasn’t expecting you to actually show up,” you mumble, “well since you are here I suppose you can answer my question then, why did you save me Castiel.” Castiel looks at you quizzically and tilts his head slightly to the side, “I do not understand, you needed help, why would I not help you.” You scoff, “come on Cas, not every hunter has an angel on speed dial; and I know I am in no way important enough to save, I mean come on I’m just a hunter,” you say, standing up and moving to the window.   
Castiel sighs and doesn’t say anything for a while, you turn to look at him; to make sure he is still there and didn’t fly off. “You humans are all the same, why do none of you believe you are worthy enough to be saved,” Castiel says finally, looking irritated. “Come on Cas, let’s face it; you are an angel of the Lord and I am just a lowly human, and when have I ever done anything that would make me worthy enough to even know an angel,” you mutter turning back to the window and watching a lonely car drive past. “You go out and save people do you not,” Castiel says, coming to stand closer to you, “have you not stood in the path of danger and sacrificed yourself for others plenty of times.” “Well, yeah of course but that just comes with the job,” you say turning around and finding yourself looking directly at Castiel’s chest.  
You slowly look up at Castiel, and you notice how blue his eyes actually are. You feel yourself getting lost in their immense depth, when Castiel clears his throat. You shake your head a little, “what” you ask dumbly. “I said you are not just some human and you are not just some hunter, Y/n, you are something so much more; I feel myself drawn to you and I do not know why” Castiel, looking replies, looking down at you. You see something move behind him, and you realize his wings have slowly wrapped around you, as if they are protecting you. You look back to his eyes and you start to something, but before you can utter a sound, Castiel is suddenly gone. You close your eyes and lean back against the window, “what is with that angel.”


	3. The Trap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get a call from a fellow hunter and you think nothing of it, little do you know that could cost you dearly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys so I will be gone for spring break and that is why I am posting this chapter early. Normally I would post it next week but I decided to post it early. So once I get back I will post part 4 for yall. Anyway, thank you so much for the support and feedback!

“Wait, you’re telling me Sam has been drinking demon blood,” you exclaim angrily, slamming the lore book you were just reading shut. “Apparently so,” Dean sighs, running a hand down his face. “What the hell are we going to do,” you say, getting up to pace the room, you run a hand through your hair as you glance at Dean. “Do you think if I knew I would just be sitting here,” Dean says, looking slightly irritated. You sigh, “I’m sorry Dean, it’s just it feels like we always get the short end of the straw.” Dean nods, “don’t worry we’ll figure out how to deal with Sam,” you say, sitting down again.  
***  
A few hours later, the motel room door opens and Sam creeps back in. Dean flicks on the light, momentarily blinding both you and Sam. “So Sam is there anything you want to tell us,” Dean asks with a slight smirk that doesn’t reach his eyes. “Look, Dean I can explain,” Sam replies holding his hands up.  
You sigh as you hear the brothers still arguing in the motel room. You had silently slipped out when it was clear you were not going to help the situation. You feel your phone vibrate and you glance at the screen before answering it. “Jo, what’s up,” you say as you answer it, “whoa slow down, okay I’ll be right there.” You close your phone and slide off the hood of the Impala, you glance at the motel and you climb into your car and drive away into the night.   
***  
“Jo, hey where are you,” you call out as you enter the abandoned warehouse, where you were supposed to be meeting Jo.  
“Well, well, well you actually fell for it,” a woman says as she steps out from the shadows. You immediately raise your gun and she flicks her hand, you sigh as your gun flies out of your hands. “So, what can I do for you, demon,” you say, as you put a hand on your hip and smirk. “Aw, no foreplay,” the demon pouts, “fine, we know you and those Winchesters are close to a certain angel, and well we would love to…. talk to him,” she smirks as her eyes go black, you grab the demon knife that’s hidden in the waistband of your jeans. You spin around and stab the demon that appeared behind you. As the demon glows orange you turn to the next one. You manage to take down five or six but you start to get tired and you slip up and your knife gets stuck in one demon. You feel an immense pain in the back of your head, before everything goes black.  
“Wake up, little hunter,” you hear as you feel a slicing pain to your side. You gasp as your eyes fly open, you notice you’re now restrained to a metal chair in the middle of the warehouse. “Oh, great, it wasn’t just a bad dream,” you roll your eyes, and the demon slaps you, “don’t talk unless I tell you to,” the demon snarls. “Now, call your little pet angel and this can all be over,” the demon says, walking around the chair so she is standing behind you. “No,” you say, the demon grabs your hair and pulls hard; forcing your head back. “I wasn’t asking you, now we can do this the hard way or the easy way,” the demon orders, before letting go of your hair. You look to the ground and don’t utter a sound, “fine hard way it is,” the demon sighs before picking up a wickedly sharp blade.  
***  
You open the one eye that wasn’t swollen shut. “Call your damn angel and this can end, hunter,” the demon yells, slamming the knife down. You shake your head as you struggle to breathe, you’re pretty sure you have several broken ribs; and you’re bleeding everywhere. Before the demon can grab another weapon, however, your phone starts ringing.  
You curse mentally as the demon snatches it out of your pocket and answers it. “Dean, lovely to hear from you, yes I have your friend here with me; we are having a lovely time….no Winchester, I don’t want you; I want the angel…. you know exactly which angel I’m talking about……if the angel isn’t here in one hour, Y/n here is dead,” the demon slams the phone down so hard it breaks in half. “Well, we have a whole hour to ourselves, how shall we pass the time,” the demon smirks as she slowly picks up her next torture device. 

“What have you done to her,” you hear a voice yell angrily.  
You slowly start to come to, when you hear a crash and a scream, then everything is silent. You slowly open your one eye; your vision is a little blurry but you manage to make out three people in the distance.   
“Y/n, what did that demon do to you,” you recognize Castiel’s voice and you watch as he comes closer and kneels down in front of you. You cough and taste your own blood. “I’m so sorry,” Castiel whispers, his eyes hold a sorrow you can barely comprehend. Castiel places a hand to your forehead and you feel the warmth of his grace course through your body. Castiel lowers his hand and you finally open both your eyes.   
“Thank you,” you say, standing up and stretching. “For what, almost getting you killed,” Castiel grumbles angrily, “you almost died because of me, Y/n, does that mean nothing to you.”  
You glance over to Sam and Dean, “give us a minute,” you say before glancing over to Castiel; “yeah sure Y/n, we’ll uh…be outside,” Sam says, he gives you a slight smile before he and Dean walk outside.   
You turn to Castiel, “Cas, look it wasn’t your fault, it was a trap and I fell right into it,” you say. “That may be so, but that demon wanted me and she almost killed you because of me,” Castiel finally turns and looks at you, you can see the sorrow in his eyes again. You slowly move towards Castiel and you brush your hand against his cheek. You feel the angel flinch slightly, and you quickly pull your hand away, “no, don’t,” Castiel whispers. Castiel gently takes your hand and moves it back to his face, you gently cup his cheek and you run your thumb across his cheekbone. Castiel closes his eyes and when he opens them you can see his grace shining through. You lick your lips and you see Castiel’s eyes look down to your lips before looking back to your eyes.   
The next moment happens in a blur. All you know is you’re suddenly leaning forward brushing your lips against his. At first he doesn’t respond and you start to pull away, but then you feel Castiel’s hand against your lower back pushing you towards him. You run your hands through his dark, messy hair, and you feel Castiel finally respond to the kiss, his lips move against yours hungrily. You feel as if the entire world just froze and it’s only the two of you, and you wish with every fiber in your being that you can just stay like this forever. Unfortunately, you need air and you finally pull away and look up at Castiel.  
Castiel looks down at you, “I do not know why I enjoyed that or why I would like to do it again,” he says squinting his eyes a little. You laugh, “well let’s take it slow for now okay.” Castiel nods, and you both walk out of the warehouse and meet up with the brothers. “you two ready to hit the road now,” Dean asks, with a slight smirk, you feel the blush rise to your cheeks.   
All of a sudden you catch movement to the side of Castiel, you watch as a demon comes sprinting full speed towards the angel. You feel your blood run cold as you catch the silver glint of an angel blade. You don’t even think, you just shove Castiel out of the way just as the demon appears in front of you and with a snarl the demon plunges the blade through your chest. You look down and watch the blood pour out of the wound as you fall to your knees. Castiel doesn’t even hesitate, he immediately goes after the demon. Dean catches you before you fall face first into the dirt and he gently lays you down, “don’t you dare die on me, Y/n,” Dean chokes out, with unshed tears in his eyes. You cough and taste the metallic tang of blood in your mouth, you struggle to breathe. “Cas, get your ass over here and save her,” Dean yells, and Sam appears with the first aid kit and desperately tries to stop the bleeding. You want to tell them how much you love all of them but the words just get stuck in your throat. You gasp for breath and the last thing you see is Castiel’s blue eyes before the darkness swallows you.


	4. The Vessel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're alive and you thought everything was going good for you, but fate decides you don't deserve to be happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry it's been awhile but I was on spring break and I just got back. So here is Chapter 4, I am actually thinking of finishing this little series up in two or three more chapters. However, if yall would like for this series to be longer please let me know. Thanks and enjoy!

You slowly open your eyes, surprisingly you don’t feel any pain. You sit up and gaze around the shabby motel room, which you have come to think of as home. Of course, not your actual home, seeing as you move around a lot, but each room looks so much alike they all seem to blur together.

“Well if this is heaven, this sucks,” you mutter, rolling your eyes and swinging your legs onto the floor. Just then Sam walks out of the bathroom and looks at you. An emotion that looks a lot like surprise flits over his face before it is gone and replaced with a huge smile. 

“Y/n, hey you’re awake finally,” Sam says walking over to you and sitting on edge on the bed. “What do you mean finally, how long have I been out,” you ask, you glance over to the window and you notice Castiel and Dean are outside, you look a little closer and notice they seem to be arguing and gesturing towards the motel room. Sam catches you staring, “yeah they have been at it since you…. uh…. basically died the other night,” Sam explains rubbing the back of his neck. He must see the alarm on your face because he immediately explains, “I mean you stopped breathing, Y/n, we thought we lost you but then Castiel came back and managed to revive you and heal your wounds.” 

“So then why are they arguing, I’m obviously alive aren’t I,” you say, shaking your head a little. “Yeah, well you know how Dean is, he sees you as his little sister and he will protect you with his life, he just feels Castiel should have been there to heal you instead of chasing after that demon,” Sam sighs as he glances out the window. “Basically what you’re saying is, Dean is blaming Castiel for me almost dying, even though I was the one who pushed Cas out of the way and took the blow for him,” you roll your eyes as Sam nods. 

“Well I’m going to go grab us something to eat and let those two know you’re awake,” Sam says getting up and running a hand through his ever growing hair. You nod as Sam leaves, you look out the window again and you watch as Castiel is obviously getting rather angry. You notice how his wings start to flare up in a threatening pose before relaxing. You notice how the moonlight makes his wings seem darker than normal, but yet you know if you were close enough you could see the different colors shimmering and dancing in the light. 

You shake yourself out of your daze as Castiel walks into the room. “Dean has gone with Sam to get food, I asked him if I could speak to you alone,” Castiel explains as he moves into the room. You nod and pat the bed beside you, Castiel seems to take the hint and sits down next to you. “Why did you take that blade for me,” Castiel asks his blue eyes shining with anger.

You sigh, “Cas, look, I saw that demon running towards you and I saw that he had an angel blade, which just so happens to be one of the only weapons that can kill you, so I took the blow so you didn’t die, okay,” your voice rising with every word. “Y/n, you almost died last night, actually you did die last night and if I had not brought you back and healed you, we would not be having this discussion,” Castiel says. “Cas, it’s all part of the job description, I know that one of these days the job is going to end bloody for me, but even if it had ended last night at least my death would have had meaning,” you say looking down at your hands, you look up when the silence gets to be too much. You know immediately that you said the wrong thing.

“You really think that little of yourself, that the only way for your life to have meaning is to sacrifice it,” Castiel growls and his eyes hold a dangerous rage now, if you didn’t know the angel and if you didn’t know he would never hurt you, then you probably would have feared for your life. 

“Cas, wait I didn’t mean….,” you start to say before Castiel’s lips are on yours, effectively cutting you off. You run your hands through his hair and the kiss deepens.

The door to the Impala slams shut outside and has the two of you quickly moving away from each other. Sam and Dean walk in with food and before you can say anything Castiel abruptly stands and disappears. “So did you two talk…,” Dean asks with a puzzled look on his face. “If you count being yelled at most of the time as talking then yeah, sure we talked,” you say rolling your eyes. You grab your bag and head to the bathroom, “I’m going to take a shower,” you say before closing the bathroom door behind you.

***

 

“Damn it, Dean pick up the phone,” you mutter as you throw your phone on the seat of your car, you slam down on the gas pedal not caring at this point how many laws you were breaking. Dean had called you saying he had gotten some message from Cas in a dream telling him to meet him at a warehouse. That had been two hours ago and now nobody was answering your calls, you were worried because you hadn’t talked to Castiel in weeks. You knew Uriel had been becoming extremely hard on Cas and then some angel prick named Zachariah showed up and you haven’t heard from him since. 

Your tires screech as you slam to a stop next to the impala. You race out of your car with your gun drawn, you stop dead however when you see the destruction on the inside of the warehouse. You walk over to where Sam and Dean are, “what the hell happened,” you ask lowering your gun, “looks like angel fight to me,” Sam says with a slight shrug. “Hey over there,” Dean says pointing, you look over and you see tan trench coat. All three of you run over just as Castiel sits up.

 

“Cas, are you okay,” you ask kneeling down in front of him. Castiel looks confused for a second, “I’m not….my name is Jimmy, Castiel is gone,” the guy who used to be Castiel says before standing up. You take a step back and it’s like the world just stopped. You can hear the brothers questioning the man who you always thought of to be Castiel. Sam appears in front of you and you can see his lips moving but you can’t make out anything he is saying.

Finally, Sam takes you by shoulders and shakes you and you snap out of it. “Y/n, what the hell is wrong with you,” Sam asks looking at you with a worried expression. You shake your head, “I…I don’t know, I mean I didn’t even know him really, but he did save my life and,” you stop and laugh all of a sudden, “I’ll never even see his wings again will I,” you ask before sinking to your knees. Sam looks over to Dean, 

“Y/n, what the hell are you talking about,” Dean asks kneeling on front of you. “You know, his wings, come on don’t act as if you didn’t see them, I mean it’s not like he hid them or anything,” you say shaking your head before looking at Dean, and that’s when you realize he has no idea what you are talking about. “Look, Y/N, let’s just get out of here and we can figure this out alright,” Dean says helping you up. You shake your head, “you guys go ahead, I’ll catch up I just need some time,” you say wrapping your arms around yourself as if to hold yourself together. Dean nods and they take Jimmy with them and head out. You take one last long look around the warehouse,

“Castiel where are you.”

***

 

In the following days after you found out Castiel had vanished, you ditched your phone and made sure you couldn’t be found, you also hadn’t been sober since. You were currently speeding down an empty road, blasting your music to try and drown out the silence. Which meant you didn’t hear the telltale sign of a certain angel appearing in your passenger seat. “Y/n,” you hear the voice you had missed so much right next to you as the music in your car is suddenly gone. Of course, it startles you and you swerve into the wrong lane before righting the car and slamming on the brakes. You feel your heart start to pound as you slowly look to your right. 

“No,” you breathe out as you see Castiel sitting there. You reach for your hidden gun, but Castiel stops you before you can grab it. “Y/n, it really is me,” Castiel explains before releasing your hand. “What, but how, I mean,” you stutter, Castiel’s face however remains impassive and that’s when you realize something is different about the angel. 

“Where have you been,” you finally manage to ask, “heaven,” Castiel replies before looking at you. Before you can ask anything else Castiel speaks again, “I know we didn’t get to speak before I left, but I realize now everything I felt for you was……...wrong and I should not have allowed anything to come of those feelings.” You stare at him trying to process what he had just said when he continues, “Y/n, what I am saying is what happened in the past will never happen again, it was a momentary lapse in judgment, also do not try to contact me unless you need assistance for something of grave import.” 

And with those parting words you are left alone in your car again and this time you feel as if a burning knife was just thrust into your heart and left there to burn for good.


	5. Soulmates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can you forgive Castiel when he unexpectedly shows back up in your life again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, so here is chapter 5. I really hope you all are enjoying this series as much as I am. I'm actually thinking of starting another series after this one finishes, if you have any ideas or suggestions for me I would love to hear it. Thanks and enjoy!

You take a swig of whiskey and drop the empty bottle in the trashcan. You sigh as you pack your hunting bag, while thinking back to how you got here.   
After Castiel had vanished from your car, you drove to the nearest motel and drunk yourself almost to death. You were passed out in the bathroom when Dean found you. Once you were sober enough he explained Castiel showed up and told him where to find you after he and Sam had gotten into a fight. A fight that now left the older Winchester alone. You agreed then to sober up and help the Winchester take down Lilith. 

So here you were packing up your hunting bag, and waiting for Dean to come back. He had left a few hours ago and you were starting to get worried. “Come on, Dean, what is with you and not answering your phone,” you mutter as you snap your phone closed for what seemed like the hundredth time.   
You sigh and just as you’re about to walk out the door, Dean and Castiel show up. “Y/n, we gotta go find Sam, he has no idea he is about to kill Lilith and break the final seal,” Dean says as he grabs his stuff. You glance over to Castiel as you nod, “then I guess we better hit the road.”  
***

You shake your head a little as your transported to Chuck’s house, “I still don’t like being teleported places,” you mutter as Dean starts to question Chuck about Sam’s location. “Y/n, I want to apologize for what I said to you in your car the last time we saw each other,” Castiel’s gruff voice comes from behind you. You bite your lip as you turn around to face him.  
“No Cas, an apology isn’t going to cut it, you hurt me in ways I didn’t even know I could be hurt,” you grit out through clenched teeth. You feel all the hurt and anger you had shoved away, bubble to the surface. “I thought you were different Cas, I thought maybe you wouldn’t be like all those other angels but then you went and turned out to be just the same,” you run a hand through your hair as you glare at him, before turning and starting to walk away. 

Castiel grabs your arm, you turn back towards him, instead of shoving his shoulders you make sure to shove as hard as you can against his wings. Castiel stumbles backwards with surprise and shock written all over his face.  
“Y/n, wait can you…. can you see my wings,” Castiel whispers suddenly looking extremely vulnerable. “Of course I can, can’t everyone,” you ask wrapping your arms around yourself. Castiel shakes his head, “no…. people can only see my wings if I show them, it is said however, in heaven, if an angel has a soulmate he or she can see the angel’s wings at all times.” You shake your head slowly, “no… that’s not possible, I can’t, I’m not… there is no way I am an angel’s soulmate,” you stutter as Castiel walks towards you. 

“It would explain a lot, for instance why I was threatened to stay away from you while I was in heaven,” Castiel mutters to himself but you manage to hear him anyway.  
“Wait, is that why you appeared in my car that day,” you ask looking up at Castiel and seeing the regret and anger flash in his eyes. “Yes, I was warned if I did not make sure to stay away from you, you would be killed,” Castiel explains regret thick in his voice. “Why didn’t you tell me that,” you whisper raising your hand up to cup his cheek. Castiel sighs as he leans his face towards your hand. “I was trying to protect you,” he whispers his bright blue eyes staring into your own.

He reaches up and brushes a strand of hair behind your ear, “I wish we had more time, but we do not I must send you and Dean to Sam’s location,” Castiel whispers, you suddenly feel a pang of unease.   
“Wait, you aren’t coming with us,” you ask, “no I must stay here and fend off the archangel to give you two time to stop the final seal from breaking,” Castiel explains looking away from you.

You feel your heart stop for a moment, “Cas, no that’s suicide, the archangel will destroy you,” you say tears starting to pool in your eyes. Dean walks into the room and Castiel sighs, “I know, but that seal must not be broken.” You feel the tears start to slip down your face and Castiel gently brushes the tears away. Castiel then leans down, giving you a soft kiss on the lips, and you feel the world around you shift.   
***

When you open your eyes, you and Dean are alone in front of an abandoned church. You wipe your eyes as Dean looks over to you, “you gonna be okay,” he asks. You nod not trusting your voice at the moment. Dean nods, grabs your hand and hauls you into the church. The two of you sprint down the hallway and when you turn the corner, you see Sam and Ruby down the hall. You and Dean start to sprint down the hall towards the open door. Before you can reach it, Ruby sees you and smirks as she slams it closed.   
Dean starts to pound on the door, while you look around for anything that could be used as a battering ram.  
Suddenly, you gasp as an intense pain rockets throughout your whole body. You collapse to the floor in pain and deep down you know it isn’t your pain you are feeling, it’s Castiel’s.   
“Y/n, what’s wrong,” Dean asks crouching down next to you frantically looking for any wounds, “I’m fine, it’s not my pain,” you grit out between the waves of pain. Dean sits back a little and confusion is written all over his face, “then whose pain is it.” 

“It’s Castiel’s,” you gasp out and suddenly the pain was gone, just as quick as the pain had started, it had stopped just as fast. You gasp for breath as you sit up, now that the pain is gone, you suddenly feel an emptiness inside you, like part of your soul had been torn from your body and you know Castiel is dead. You look over to Dean and slowly shake your head, he nods understanding. He grabs your hand and helps you up, he gives you a brief hug, then the two of you get back to breaking down the door.  
***

The door suddenly gives way and you both stumble inside. “Sam,” Dean yells, and you can see you’re already too late, Lilith is on the floor dead, her blood starts to form an intricate design on the floor. You look over to Sam, he looks absolutely devastated as he turns to Dean. Ruby however, is laughing and talking like maniac, she quickly stops as Sam grabs her and holds her still while Dean runs her through with the demon knife. 

“Guys, I think it’s time we got out of here,” you yell as the floor starts to open up with a bright light. You turn but before you can leave the room the door slams shut, locking you all in the room. All three of you turn and look at the floor opening up. You throw your arm over your face as if to block out the light, and just as death seems inevitable, all three of you are suddenly on a plane. 

“What the hell,” Dean breathes out looking around in confusion. You look around, and you move closer to the window of the plane. “Um, guys look,” you say pointing out the window. All three of you watch as the church you were just in explodes in a flash of light. 

***

You bite your lip as you walk into Chuck’s house. Dean looks at you sympathetically, you told him everything on the plane and he knows now Castiel was your soulmate. The only thing the two of you couldn’t figure out was how you felt his pain at the very end. 

You feel a tear slide down your face when you see the blood and gore everywhere. From the other room you hear a thud and Sam curse loudly. “Sorry Sam I didn’t know it was you,” you hear Chuck say as you round the corner into the next room. “I’m really sorry about Castiel,” Chucks says turning to look at you, you just nod, fearing if you tried to talk you might breakdown into tears. 

“Well, well, well if it isn’t the Winchesters and their little gal pal,” you hear Zachariah call from behind you. “Sorry about Castiel, but well he did pick a fight with an archangel,” Zachariah says with a shrug.   
“You…you were the one who made Cas turn on us,” you say turning and stepping forward. “Ah…well yes, you see I knew you two were soulmates, and seeing as how you are buddy, buddy with the Winchesters, I couldn’t let Castiel stray off target now could I,” Zachariah explains. You feel yourself tense up as your vision seems to go red from a rage you have never felt before, Sam lays a hand on shoulder and you take in a deep breath trying to calm down. 

Zachariah suddenly seems to notice Dean, “Dean, why is your hand bleeding,” he asks with an almost confused look. Dean looks up with a smirk and says, “I learned this from my friend Cas, you angel dick,” as he slams his hand down on the angel banishing sigil he had hidden behind the door. You throw your arm over your eyes to block out the bright light. 

“Great, so we still have to deal with a bunch of angels,” you mutter as you leave Chuck’s house. Dean sighs and runs a hand over his face, you look over at him and suddenly notice how tired and worn down he looks. “Hey we can worry about all that angel stuff later okay,” you say as you rest a hand on his arm. 

Dean looks over at you and before you can blink he has you in a crushing hug. “Please don’t ever change,” Dean whispers into your hair, you nod, “I’ll try my best.” He seems content with your answer and you hug him back trying to convey to him that you would always be there for him and Sam no matter what.


	6. Coming to life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel comes back but like always there is something dark lurking on the horizon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, we are almost at the end of this little series. I am seriously so happy with all the feedback and support I have gotten. So there is only one more chapter after this, so enjoy!

You sigh running a hand through your windblown hair. “So the angels are looking for the Michael sword,” you ask putting the phone back up to your ear. 

“Yeah, we found out it’s supposed to be stashed in one of dad’s old warehouses,” Dean replies. You groan internally knowing you are going to have to deal with more angels.

“Alright I’ll be there in an hour,” you reply as you write down the address on your hand. You hear the click meaning Dean had hung up. You push yourself off the hood of your car, you look up to the cloudy, gray skies above you.

“I miss you, Cas,” you whisper, your voice cracking at the end.  
***  
You arrive at the warehouse at the same time as the brothers. “Hey boys,” you greet them as you get out of your car. They give back greetings as you strap on a gun, just in case you think to yourself. The three of you head into the warehouse.

“Do you guys even know what this supposed sword looks like,” you ask making quotation marks with your fingers.

Sam just kinda shrugs as Dean sighs, “it probably looks like a regular sword I guess.” 

You roll your eyes, “you have no idea do you,” you mutter, as the three of you look around the warehouse.  
***

You’re shifting some items around in a box when you hear the telltale sign of angel wings enter the room 

“Winchesters, so nice to see you again,” Zachariah calls as he shows up in the warehouse.

“Oh great not you again,” Dean mutters rolling his eyes. 

“I assume you are looking for the Michael sword,” Zachariah says getting right to the point.

“Maybe, maybe not,” Dean smirks while crossing his arms over his chest.

“Well, Dean… the thing is, you are in fact the Michael sword,” Zachariah explains pacing a little, you look over to Dean. He starts to open his mouth to say something when Zachariah continues. 

“Yes, you are the sword or Michael’s true vessel in other words, but of course there is the little issue of consent,” Zachariah sighs as if he thinks angels should be able to possess whoever they please. 

“So you need my permission,” Dean replies, “well guess what, you can’t have it.”

Zachariah only smirks, “I think you’ll change your mind…. when Sam has no lungs, …how long do you think he can hold on for Dean.”

Sam suddenly grabs his chest, falling to floor as all his oxygen supply is cut off. “Sam,” you yell as you rush over to his side, knowing in the back of your mind there is nothing you can do to help him. You look up at Dean, seeing a flicker of uncertainty flash across his eyes, “my answer is still no.”

“Fine, maybe you will change your tune when Y/n here, starts to puke up her insides; oh and Dean… she is of no use to us so she can die and I won’t bring her back,” Zachariah smirks as his cold eyes look into yours.

You let go of Sam as an intense pain suddenly grips you. You clutch your stomach as you start throwing up blood. You hear Dean suddenly fall to the floor in pain as well; you cough up more blood as you look over to Zachariah and you notice a new angel has arrived. Your vision is fading fast as you see Zachariah’s two goons suddenly crumble to the floor lifeless, after that it all goes black.   
***  
“Please tell me she is okay,” you hear Dean’s gruff voice laced with worry. You open your eyes and sit up slowly. As you cast your gaze from Dean, your eyes land on a familiar trench coat. Your breath catches in your throat. Castiel turns from Sam to look at you. 

“Y/n,” he whispers your name like an unspoken prayer. You choke back the tears that threaten to spill, “Cas, I thought you were dead,” you whisper your voice cracking. 

Dean nods to Sam and they both quietly leave to give the two of you space. You stand up, brushing off your jeans; Castiel immediately is at your side looking down into your eyes. You don’t hesitate as you crash your lips against his. You feel the bond between the two of you reawaken as the world around you grinds to a halt and you deepen the kiss. 

Your tongue gently sweeps across his bottom lip as if asking for entrance. Castiel grants it and involuntarily moans as your tongue pushes into his mouth. You gasp and break away when you suddenly feel your back pushed against a wall.

Your lips are a fraction away from Castiel’s, “what are you doing to me,” Castiel whispers as you look up into his eyes. 

You lick your lips as you notice his once stormy blue eyes are now full of lust. Castiel utters a growl and crushes your lips against his. You thread your fingers through his hair and tug gently. 

You pull away after a few moments, “I do not think this is quite the appropriate place to do this,” Castiel mumbles against your lips. 

You give a breathy laugh, “no, I don’t think it is.”

Castiel moves away from you with reluctance clear in his face, a smile tugs at your lips and you quickly lace your fingers together with his. 

Castiel looks down at your joined hands with a frown, “I do not understand,” he says looking back up at you.

“It’s just something we humans close we can still feel close to someone we really care about,” you explain as the two of you walk out of the building. 

Dean rolls his eyes as he sees your joined hands, “alright Sammy fork it over,” Sam grimaces as he digs into his pocket pulling out money.

“Really guys,” you huff putting your free hand on your hip. 

Dean just laughs, “well we are headin back to the motel, do you guys wanna join us or do you two need some private time,” Dean winks.

You roll your eyes opening your mouth to say something, when Cas speaks for you, “we do need some time to discuss various things,” he said with his usual completely serious face. 

Dean snickers as he climbs into the Impala with Sam. You wave as the Impala rumbles down the dusty road back to the motel where you were staying. You glance over at Castiel, noticing that he is already looking at you. 

“Y/n, we do need to talk about the being soulmates issue,” Castiel starts and you nod your head as Castiel shifts the world and you both are suddenly on a remote beach. 

“This place is beautiful,” you mumble taking in your surroundings noticing its dusk now instead of being around midday. 

“Yes, I like to come here to think sometimes,” Castiel replies, “Y/n, I never thought I would have a soulmate, in heaven the whole soulmate thing was rumors; I have never even heard of an angel having a soulmate before.” 

Castiel sighs and closes his eyes for a brief second before continuing, “Y/n, being my soulmate will put you in even more danger than you are already in.” 

Castiel looks over at you as you shake your head, “Cas, do you really think that you saying that will just make me leave, I hate to break it to you but I am not going anywhere. You are stuck with me whether you like it or not.”

Castiel smiles sadly, “I am not worthy of you,” he whispers before looking away from you. 

You reach up and brush your hand against his cheek making him look at you again, “Cas, that’s not true,” you whisper. 

You can see the torrent of emotions flicker through his eyes as he weighs your words in his head. You surprise yourself when you lean forward and kiss him pouring all your love into the kiss. Castiel doesn’t even hesitate when he kisses you back while pulling you closer to him so there is no space in between the two of you. 

You pull away when you hear your phone start ringing, you sigh when you see it’s Dean calling you. 

“Dean, what… I was kind of busy,” you snap at him rolling your eyes a little and making Castiel chuckle slightly. 

“Y/n, you need to get your ass back here, Sam is gone and I can’t find him,” Dean explains slightly frantic and you can hear the roar of the Impala now in the background. 

You feel the blood drain from your face, “okay Dean, I’ll be there soon; please don’t do anything stupid until I get there,” you reply looking at Cas, noticing he now looked very pissed off.

You hang up with Dean but before you can say anything, Castiel speaks, “I know where Sam is, unfortunately he is being heavily guarded.”

You nod, “okay so we go meet up with Dean and we come up with a plan,” you start to say but Castiel interrupts you.

“Y/n, it’s a suicide mission, if we go to rescue Sam, one of us is very likely not to make it out alive.”

You swallow hard, “Cas, its Sam we have to go get him,” you reply crossing your arms showing him you weren’t going to be changing your mind.

“Cas, I know you want to protect me, but like I said you are stuck with me and I am going to go help Sam, so are you going to help or not,” you say stubbornly watching the emotions cross Castiel’s face.

Castiel sighs, “fine let’s go to Dean then,” he takes your hand and the world shifts around you again.

“Finally, you two are back, grab your stuff we need to find Sam,” Dean orders as he stops pacing the motel room you are now in. 

“Dean, I know where Sam is, but I must warn you he is being heavily guarded by angels and demons alike,” Castiel says looking between the two of you.

“Well that’s great Cas, let’s go,” Dean retorts grabbing his stuff.

Castiel sighs as you go and grab your hunting bag off the bed, he finally walks over to the two of you and places a hand on each your shoulders.

You wind up outside of an abandoned building, you take in a deep breath as you see the place is swarming with demons and angels just like Cas had said. 

You look over to Dean and Castiel and you suddenly find yourself praying and hoping to whoever would listen that all of you would come out of this fight alive.


	7. The Finale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens when you go into the building to rescue Sam, will all of you make it out alive or not?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys so this is it, the big ending. Ive had so much fun writing this and the feedback has been amazing, thank yall so much for reading and I hope yall enjoy!!

You blink opening your eyes, you squint a little against the bright light shining in your face. You groan getting up off the ground, “where the hell am I,” you mutter to yourself. The last thing you remembered was pain, horrible intense pain before everything blacked out.

You look around you noticing you were in some sort of forest, there was a river slowly winding its way through the forest to your right. You spin around calling out, “Cas, Dean, where are you,” you turn the other way, “guys, this isn’t funny where are you.”

You slowly make your way through the forest trying to remember what happened to you, when you come across a tiny shack. “Okay, this is weird,” you whisper walking to the door, you are about to open it when it suddenly swings open and an arm grabs you pulling you inside.

You immediately fight back, struggling to get free when a familiar voice calms you down, “whoa there, Y/n, would you really wanna mess up this face.”

You stop struggling to notice Ash is standing in front of you looking the exact same as he did before he died in the fire that took out the Roadhouse a few years ago.

“Ash, but how…you died…in the fire,” you ask hesitantly starting to put the pieces together now.

“Yeah, which means if you’re here, you died too…sorry,” Ash says before leading you into an exact replica of the bar from the roadhouse. 

“Wait, no that…I was just with Cas and Dean,” you mutter taking a seat at the bar as Ash pours you a shot of whiskey.

“Well, what do you remember,” Ash asks sliding you the whiskey.

You take a swig trying to think back, you closed your eyes as a memory starts to come back to you.

***

1 hour earlier

“Alright, when we go in, we go in quiet, no need trying to stir up a hornet’s nest,” Dean ordered handing you an angel blade.

You nod as adrenaline starts pumping through your veins, you bite your lip as your senses are sharpened.

Castiel glances over at you before kissing you quickly, “you better not die in there,” you whisper as you pull apart from each other. 

Castiel nods, “the same goes for you as well Y/n,” he whispers before the three of you go your separate ways.

Once you get to the door, you close your eyes uttering one last prayer before you open the door quietly. You quietly creep through the hallway, your angel blade at the ready. You turn the corner jumping two demons, you manage to take them out quickly and quietly. You manage to make it to a huge room that strangely isn’t guarded.

“Okay, this does not look good,” you mutter as you scan the room, you gasp when your gaze falls on Sam tied up in the middle of the room.

You rush over starting to untie his bonds when he wakes up, “Y/n, no, no, no you can’t be here, its’s a trap, you gotta leave,” Sam tries to warn you.

“Oh but Sam, she can’t leave yet I want to have some fun first,” you stop when you hear the voice behind you.

You slowly stand up and turn around coming face to face with Lucifer himself, “Lucifer,” you whisper your blood running cold with terror.

“The one and only,” Lucifer smiles before walking towards you, “now I did not expect you to show up, but you could work as an example,” Lucifer says stopping right in front of you. You flinch when he slowly runs the back of his hand down your face.

At that moment Castiel and Dean run into the room, freezing when they see Lucifer, you look at them with wide eyes. 

“Ah, now the rest of the gang is here,” Lucifer mutters before turning around, “how nice of you to join us.”

Castiel starts to step forward but stops when Lucifer places a hand on your shoulder, “now Cas, I know you are fond of this human, so I will give you a chance, join me and I let her live,” Lucifer offers.

You swallow thickly, “no, Cas I’ll be okay, just make sure you get Sam out of here, okay,” you say pleading with your eyes.

You can see Castiel’s inner struggle and that’s when you know you have to act, you shove Lucifer making sure you grab your angel blade; you slash Sam’s ropes and turn to face Lucifer.

You swing your arm when Lucifer grabs and twists, you scream in pain as the angel blade falls to the floor, before anybody can react Lucifer places a hand on your forehead and all you see is white. You can hear Castiel screaming before you feel the pain. You scream as pain so excruciating reverberates though out your head. 

***

You gasp clutching your head as you slowly open your eyes, seeing Ash look at you in concern, “you remember how you died,” Ash states pouring you another shot.

You nod quickly downing the shot of whiskey, feeling the burn as it slides down your throat, “yeah Lucifer killed me,” you say. 

“Well ain’t that a hell of a way to go out,” Ash says, “well if I know anything, I know that somehow you’ll end up going back. 

You shake your head, “no way, they have to know by now what’s dead should stay dead,” you mutter as tears fill your eyes.

You feel your heart break at the thought of never seeing the brothers again, but what really hurts is the thought of never seeing Castiel again. You glance up at the ceiling as the tears fall onto the bar top, you notice Ash has left you alone.

You finally just let the tears fall, knowing it won’t do any good but it still helps the ache in your heart. You rub your eyes after a few minutes, once the tears finally stop and all you feel is the dull ache in your heart. 

***

You soon realize time works differently in Heaven, what feels like minutes to you was days to the real world. You spend most of your time with Ash, exploring other people’s heavens and trying not to get caught by angels.

You fall through the door to the bar laughing and out of breath as Ash stumbles in behind you. “Man that angel was so surprised when he saw us,” you laugh taking a seat at the bar.

Ash chuckles as he opens up his laptop, before you can say anything else however, you feel a weird sensation tugging at you.

Ash notices your discomfort, he just smiles gently, “looks like those boys found a way to bring you back to life,” Ash says.

Your eyes widen slightly as Ash gives you a hug, “make sure it’s a long time before I see you again okay,” he whispers before letting you go.

You smile and nod as everything around you fades to black.  
***

You sit up gasping for air as you look around you, you notice you’re in a forest again but it’s nighttime and this one doesn’t feel as safe. You quickly stand up brushing yourself off, you check your pockets finding your cellphone. You cross your fingers as you pull it out but sigh as you realize its dead.

You wrap your arms around you as you hesitantly call out, “C-Cas,” you croak your voice breaking from not being used in a while.

You shiver a little as the wind starts to blow, making the air around you become chilled. You sigh as you start walking trying not to trip over anything. You manage to make it to a clearing when you hear the familiar sound of wings behind you.

“Y/n,” you hear a familiar gruff voice whisper behind you, you spin around seeing Castiel’s eyes widen in shock.

“Cas,” you breath out as you run over to him wrapping your arms around him, you pull away when it’s clear he isn’t going to return your embrace.

“Cas, what’s wrong,” you ask as he stares at you with a puzzled look on his face, “didn’t you guys bring me back,” you whisper.

“No, I mean I did not but perhaps Dean and Sam might have,” Castiel finally says looking down at you.

You bite your lip as you suddenly feel a sense of dread, Castiel finally seems to snap out of his daze as he slowly caresses your cheek.

You feel your eyes fill with tears as you lean into his touch, “I missed you so much,” you whisper as you look into Castiel’s eyes seeing the pain you felt reflected there.

“I missed you as well, I searched Heaven for you whenever I could, but I couldn’t find you,” Castiel whispers leaning his forehead against yours.

“Sorry, it’s probably because I kept switching places,” you whisper a slight smile forming, “Cas, how long was I gone,” you ask as Castiel sighs.

“Two months,” he whispers finally leaning back, “I tried everything I could to bring you back, after Lucifer…killed you, he just disappeared,” Castiel explains his eyes lighting up with rage.

“So, if you didn’t bring me back, then who did,” you ask as Castiel shakes his head a little.

“I don’t know, but we can figure that out at a later time, you are alive and that is all that matters, I promise you I won’t let anything happen to you ever again,” Castiel says his eyes filling with tears.

You smile as you reach up kissing him, you start to pull away when he holds you to him. You can feel all the pain and anger in the kiss. You run your hands through his hair as he deepens the kiss, you feel the world shift around you and when you pull away, you see you’re in a motel room. 

Castiel gently guides you to the bed, making sure to kiss you the whole way there. You feel the back of your knees hit the bed and you quickly lay down pulling Castiel with you. You pull him down so you can kiss him again as you feel his hands roam over your body.

“I will never let anything happen to you again,” you hear Castiel whisper as he starts kissing your neck making sure to leave marks. 

“I know,” you whisper as Castiel looks at you his eyes full of lust, you kiss him hard trying to forget everything that happened to you.

The two of you spend the entire night together, showing each other how much you missed the other, by the time the two of you were done the sun had already risen high in the sky.

You lay your head on Castiel’s bare chest, “Cas, how are we going to stop the Apocalypse,” you whisper as you trace symbols on his chest.

Castiel’s grip on you tightens a little, “I am not entirely sure, Y/n, but one thing I am positive about, is no matter how it ends I will always be by your side, no matter what,” he whispers kissing your forehead as you look up at him.

You smile as you lean up to kiss him, when you pull away you see the promise in his eyes and you know no matter what happens you will always have your angel of the Lord by your side.


End file.
